Friday, April 18, 2008


Stan is always horny, but he won't admit it.
He says it doesn't work for him
to say so on job interviews. Let him eat cake

off my tongue I say
sooner or later
he'll get it, I mean
he'll get some satisfaction
by shouting it out to the world. Me?
I look up. "You have sausage
in your pants." "Yes, it needed
"Oh." And I go over and look
at a stonecutter hammering away
at his rock perhaps a hundred times
without getting a hand cramp. He has
these weird braces that make sex
difficult, and his room smells

of Jeff. It's not a terrible smell, actually,
but it's definitely there. Also, there's no
soothing white space to stare at until he's finished.
"Celebrity Butt Crack Galleries"
are going
on on all fours. I drop The sausage
is finished. "Where's
All that's left is just remnants of oil
in hard-to-get spots, "It was too much,"
Stan says. Maybe for you! Me, I could eat
sausage all day. I'm pregnant and outrageously horny
and my husband's too busy for sexI'm horny!
Slang term for female masturbation

--Benjamin Friedlander


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